Everyone, gather around. I have an announcement. Single Mom Nation has made it to the very top. We've crested the summit overlooking the very noisy, Snapchat-curious valley of parenthood blogging. That's right — we've been named one of the top mom blogs. Of all time. Ever. Over all the lands.
When someone chooses your site out of the 84782309323290976 mom blogs out there and says, "Hey, lady, you are one of the best!" then you take that pretend trophy, thank God and your mom and the people in the balcony, try not to trip over your ridiculous designer gown while focusing harder on Adele and Jimmy Fallon in the front row and you cross your fingers you get on the list for a killer after-party.
That, or you just do a little "I can do anything good" dance in your own bathroom mirror. Either is cool.
I am not even completely sure what this FirstSiteGuide internet destination is, but they've clearly done a damn fine job culling the very best mom blogs as examples for any nerd who wants to start typing on their own computer, slapping up tips on essential oils and pictures of whatever they ordered at Craplebee's and call it a lifestyle site (or their own clients — also fine). Out of an ungodly number of mom blogs out there, they've narrowed it down 79 gold-medal winners. And 79 is a great number. It's not the predictable 100, and it's not the same (lovely, smiling) top five we (in the biz) all expect (and that those in the biz have a tizzy-tantrum over if those top five are not The Top Five every time). I will take 79, particularly because they are alpha-ordered rather than by something (also predictable) like page views or how many Today show appearances in the past ten weeks.
Here's what the FirstSiteGuide wisely note about we 79 stars:
[M]om blogs can be tricky. Most die pretty quick, because running a blog is a little like having another kid—except this one you can abandon without any legal repercussions. Life happens, and life tends to happen a lot to people trying to raise other human beings.
Still, we’ve found a few mom bloggers that have not only stuck with it, but raised the blogging equivalent of Harvard graduate, Air Force fighter pilot, Olympians. Check out their blogs to find out how to get mom blogs right!
Are you kidding me?! We are not only plugging away at this Single Mom Nation thing, we are doing Malala-equivalent parenting? Thank you, MA'AMS. And we are doing it in a co-op of 78 other greats, including single moms Renee at Cutie Booty Cakes and Alexa at Single Moms Income and Heather at Dooce, friends Amy and Audrey and Gabrielle, and sites we read like this one and this one (plus, a few dozen more bloggers we don't know but are clearly also amaze).
I am not quite sure where the plaque copy was pulled from, but hey, still beaming here. I am also not IN LOVE with the avatar, but I've always been curious about whether I should click the Facebook ad to use a Fivrr artist to create one of these sketched pics for me, and now I know for sure. ONWARD, though, to the backstage press room where I get to hold up my statuette and answer unrelated, slightly embarrassing questions about those pics of me and JLaw out on the town.
Again, thank you. We here at Single Mom Nation are honored and reinvigorated to write about lip gloss and custody with this shiny validator on the shelf of the room where the mommy blogging magic happens.
And now with the same serious face I use to sternly get my son to stop making bodily function puns when I really want to laugh, I say a grateful THANK YOU. And I mean it. No, truly this time. I mean it. THANK YOU. It's lovely to be listed among all these women making things happen in the suburbs and with coupons and despite the extraordinarily high fail rate of Pinterest crafts. I MEAN IT — merci beaucoup.
To First Site Guide, who is obviously first and also a site guide, I thank you. To the intern who dug up these mom blog links from a PR lady's list of emails to notify about a very compelling new food dehydrator or vajazzler design, I also thank you. To the junior copywriter who wrote the briefs and then tweeted out the staff Jimmy John's order, I see you and I commend your work here. And to the Fivrr craftsperson who balanced my hat flat hair with razor-sharp cheekbones, thank you to you, too. A round of applause all around.
I mean it. HONESTLY. It's an honor to be here.*